Why I decided To Give Up 'The Drink'

Sesh Nazz over & out! ✌🏻

Nah, all jokes aside, this is something I have been contemplating for quite a while now.

Anyone who knows me (especially from the age of 16 - 30) will say awww Nerissa, she fuckin LOVES the sesh, great crack, always up for pints…etc, etc.

It kind of annoys me in Ireland (and everywhere actually, when I ordered a Diet Coke last night in Mallorca, I got the same response) that the only valid reasons for not drinking at a social occasion are:

1. I’m driving

2. I’m pregnant

3. I am a recovering alcoholic

It’s as if, if you don’t want to drink, there MUST be a reason.

We Irish, are a nation known for our love of the sauce & rightly so, we cannot deny that as a whole, we are quite known for being binge drinkers who drink to get el locko!

We wouldn’t be known for being the type of people that go for brunch and have just the one glass of secco…

NOT EVERYONE. I know some people who can have the one glass of wine & park it.

I am NOT that person NOR am I someone who actually likes the taste of drink.

I drink for a purpose and that has always been to get drunk. I sound like an alco but bare with me.

This was all fun & games until about 2 - 3 years ago when it wasn’t just a ‘headache & feeling sick’ hangover anymore.

It was genuine anxiety and uneasiness.

I wouldn’t be able to eat.

Not because I was sick from the shots (I probably was) but I actually just could not shake that feeling of anciness & pure anxiety that would hit me like a wave roughly around the afternoon time after a night on the beer.

It wasn’t beer fear.

Even if I wasn’t that drunk the night before and did absolutely NOTHING to be fearful about, I could not shake that uneasy feeling.

I am a bit of a control freak and like to be in control of what I can - factors that are within my control.

I train hard and eat well to look after my body & mind.

I read, meditate & practice yoga for my body & mind.

I try to surround myself with like-minded people who are on a journey of self-development.

All this leaves me feeling very much in control of FACTORS WITHIN MY CONTROL.

My body & mind.

So what is the beef with drink?

It is NOT the loss of control on a night out, tbh, I’m probably too drunk to notice that!

It’s the next day, that feeling of what I can only describe as….existential dread…. is something I just cannot seem to shake!

It leaves me feeling like a shell of the person I KNOW I CAN BE.

So I’ve come to the conclusion, is the couple of hours on the sesh REALLY worth the two days of hell after? Cause let’s be honest, you don’t ever feel too minty fresh the day AFTER the day after… You’re still groggy AF!

So, if you are reading this and you see me out and about drinking a diet coke, please don’t feel the need to throw some vodka in it for good measure! 😉

Since deciding to do this, everyone i've met so far jumps on the bandwagon of saying 'Aw, it's cause you're a big fitness head now'.

I promise you that is not the case.

Okay, truth be told I would much rather use my calories on food but that is FAR from the reason why I have decided to do this.

I actually think it is Yoga that allowed me to come to terms with this.

Practicing yoga, for me personally, is empowering as it allowed me to REALLY dig deep and get in touch with myself on both a mental and physical level.

I've spent so much of my life ignoring all the things my body has been trying to tell me. Dancing through injuries, not resting when i'm clearly exhausted, starving myself for upcoming tours, events, etc. Keeping myself SO busy to distract myself from anxiety. Drinking even though I knew deep down it wasn't just your average hangover anymore.

It was like I was in a constant battle with my own mind and body.

Yoga has changed that. It's not that it happened over night, it didn't. Big changes rarely do but my mindset has shifted in the last year and the common denominator (along with the spiralling effects of the amazing places, people and things i've experienced since) has come from starting to FINALLY LISTEN to my own body!

I urge you that if something doesn't feel quite right, whatever that may be?

Dig deep.

Question it.

There's a reason why you are feeling a certain way and don't ignore that.

Magic things start happening when you begin to listen.